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Double Life

July 29th, 2005

Dr Petra

Have you ever pretended to be someone you weren’t? Perhaps when you were chatting someone up you made out you had a glamorous sounding job rather than your mundane one?

Or maybe you like to take on a character to liven up a boring workday?

Some people get a real buzz out of pretending to be someone they’re not during sex. It might be just to think of characteristics of someone they admire – for example an outspoken celebrity – and then to act like that person in bed. Or they may role-play a historical, fantasy, or famous character.

You could lead a double life playing with gender, your age, sexuality, or power games.

And in some cases people find themselves caught up in a double life when they’re having an affair – deceiving their long-term partner and their lover.

The problem is when we think ‘double life’ we tend to associate it with lies and cheating.

However taking on a character – either just emulating general characteristics, or going further and going into role play can add a new angle to your (love) life as well as give you the confidence to try new things.

We explored these issues and more this morning on BBC 5 Live’s ‘Up All Night’ sex phone in.

We were joined by Tracy Quan who talked about her book ‘Diary of a Manhattan Call Girl’ that details the double life of an engaged woman who works as a high class escort behind her fiancé’s back.

You could try it for yourself this weekend. Think of someone you’ve always wanted to be, or one or more characters you’d like to try on and see what happens!

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